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WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN

 
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indicaspice
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 11:45 pm    Post subject: WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN Reply with quote

To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own,
grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something to make you
chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the
thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first
thing he said was "DON'T!"

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.

"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have forbidden
fruit!!!!!"

"No Way!"

"Yes way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.

"Why"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why He
hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later, God
saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you?" said the Father.

"I don't know," said Eve.

"She started it!" Adam said

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve
should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never
changed.

BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and
they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising
children, what makes you think it wou ld be a piece of cake for you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and
talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for
word what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself
that there are children more awful than your own.

6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing
home one day.

AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO
WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:

"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"
_________________

NO Deep integration!



What worries you masters you.

Haddon W. Robinson
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Rev. Bob
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Joined: 15 Dec 2003
Posts: 307
Location: SE Ireland

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 12:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing
Laughing
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Rev. Bob

Use the Cannabis as a Sacrament ;
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Buddy
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 2:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

grins
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Fear Ends.
Hope Begins.
Kucinich in 2004.
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machete
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Joined: 22 Jan 2004
Posts: 236
Location: Ecuador

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 4:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

rofl rofl
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Lilli
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Joined: 12 Dec 2003
Posts: 4218

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 4:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

roflmao roflol roflol roflol roflol
_________________

I pass to you the torch that Christ once passed to me.
Others are still in the dark and need
the light to see.
"I AM"
"Gathering the fragments so that
none are lost"
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Echo
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Joined: 14 Apr 2003
Posts: 1899
Location: England

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 10:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote


Now... this was a good one Laughing claps roflol

Schools closed due to bad weather, I have 7 (seven) children at home right now Wink

_________________
Tom Petty wrote:
Well I know what’s right, I got just one life
In a world that keeps on pushin’ me around
But I’ll stand my ground and I won’t back down
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Kate
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Joined: 31 Jan 2004
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Location: boynton beach, florida

PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2004 11:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lol-so true! lol
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BabyBuD
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Joined: 21 Dec 2003
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 05, 2004 5:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

lol that was crazy lol Laughing
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