Hell hath no fury then a scorned woman

[Lilli]

After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for a younger woman. He
wanted to continue living in their downtown luxury apartment with his new
lover so he asked his wife to move out and get another place.
His wife agreed to this, provided that he would give her 3 days alone at the
apartment to pack up her things.
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and
suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her
things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining
table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a
pound of shrimp and a bottle of Chardonnay. When she had finished, she went
into each room and deposited a few of the half-eaten shrimp shells into the
hollow of the curtain rods.
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the
first few days. Then slowly the apartment began to smell. They tried
everything; cleaning & mopping and airing the place out.
Vents were checked for dead rodents, carpets were steam cleaned. Air
fresheners were hung everywhere.
Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they
had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the
expensive carpet.
Finally, they could not take it any longer and decided to move. They could
not find a buyer for their stinky apartment so they had to borrow a huge sum
of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The moving company arrived and did a very professional packing job, taking
everything to their new home ... including the curtain rods!
_________________

I pass to you the torch that Christ once passed to me.
Others are still in the dark and need
the light to see.
"I AM"
"Gathering the fragments so that
none are lost"
His Shepherdess
http://missouri.thcministry.org/

[PotSmokingFiend]

lol!!!

i know a few girls who would actually do that!! lol!!!
i think its best not to piss them off!!
_________________
'Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there with open arms and open eyes. Whatever tomorrow brings I'll be there, I'll be there.' Incubus - Drive

[Lilli]

_________________

I pass to you the torch that Christ once passed to me.
Others are still in the dark and need
the light to see.
"I AM"
"Gathering the fragments so that
none are lost"
His Shepherdess
http://missouri.thcministry.org/

[merry]

A man seeing flashing red and blue lights in his rear view mirror pulls to the side of the road. A minute or so after coming to a stop, a police officer approaches the car.
The man says, "What's the problem officer?"
Officer: You were going 75 miles an hour in a 55 mile an hour zone. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ticket you.
Man: No sir, I was going a little over 60.
Wife: Oh, Harry. You were going at least 80!
[The man gives wife dirty look.]
Officer: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken taillight.
Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!
Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks!
[The man gives his wife another a dirty look.]
Officer: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.
Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.
Wife: Oh, Harry, you never wear your seat belt!
The Man turns to his wife and yells, "For cryin' out loud, can'tyou just shut up?!"
The officer turns to the woman and asks, "Ma'am, Does yourhusband talk to you this way all the time?"
Wife says, "No officer, Only when he's drunk."

hmmm guess my example of what may of happened could be this....

...not only did his wife hear him proposition the waitress with "We are
not happily married, she has ruined my life,call me after work *wink* my wife is so lame she will be asleep by ten, we can meet at the Hilton "
...but it seems was her office party and a few co workers also could hear his drunkin' obnoxious ass.....
hehe the added twist being not only does hell not hath no fury like a woman scorned but you should ALWAYS remember if you are gonna go out drinking heavily in public remember ...
YOU ARE DRUNK..... QUIT YELLING!!! hehe eva notice the volume level on drunks?

ohhh and the waitress was so disgusted by the drunkin idiots advances she accepted the twenty dolla bill in the ladies room from the wife to call the police with concerns of possible dwi

she then returned to the bar and got very hammered.... took the bisexual waitress home along with the well known stallion bartender anton....worry free as to in her town they hold drunks 20 hours so her husband would not be home....

...but this woman also knew the husbands best friend , who happened to live next door, would surely tell such a tale(serves him right she thought, i am still attractive woman...yeah why wouldn' the waitress prefer me anyways?)
....surely enough the husband returned...talked to the friend...was filled with rage...."you bitch, how could you...was it good?"
the wife reply's ... "yesss it was the most wonderful feast of my life.That Anton can do amazing things with a sausage and that banita...ohhh what a sweet muffin i must confess, so moist and warm"

...of course to this the husband went into a rage....and as most often do the first reaction to being hurt is to hurt right back...he proceeds to tell the wife of the affairs he has had...the wonderful perky breasts...ohhh...and i bet ya din' know i blow my boss either did ya honey...i have been getting "bonuses for years i neva told ya about " ha you get any money bitch?...yeah i can also appreciate a good sausage...luv them sausages and scrambled eggs..."you bitch how ya like that?"

hehe well i sure do guess she liked it just fine...during the divorce she ended up with everything including a very wealthy bribe from the mr's boss...alimony for the grief of all the perky breasts...and of course half of all the missed bonuses when mr even kept his new position of "Office Head" and did not tell you...(as boss let mr keep job as long as was all kept hush hush and of course the husband had to also to continue to give the boss head for free since his drunkin stuper had caused such a threat to the company and otherwise would loose his job )

why did the wife prevail i imagine?....because the waitress and bartender where actually cousins and roomates...their apartment was being fumigated and offered the wife a designated ride home along with a homemade breakfast in return for a place to stay for the evening....


kay so what is the morals of the story now....hmmm...lol i lost myself here even.....wow could be many even...

main one is neva accuse a woman of ruining your life...might just be you ruined it yourself? or if not, sure after such she will help you accomplish such...lol


ohh and sorry for cloggin up your board i must be stoned sheesh i dunno why the short story...hehe...guess felt bit creative

but interested as to what others might have thought happened before they were pulled over even...
why was this woman scorn?








hmmm


_________________
The problems of the world have become sooo complex,even bartenders don't have the answers....

[PotSmokingFiend]

first of all...
LMAO!!!!!!!!



...very funny story merry!!!

secondly...
i thing the woman could hav just been suffering from years of neglect. maybe her husband was fooling around with other women as you so well put.

alternatively (sorry for this ladies, no offence meant) she could hav been a little cranky from being on her period and they had just had a bit of an arguement and she was just blowing it all out of proportion and getting in a strop!

either option sounds perfectly plausable. although some of your ideas were a bit extreme lol


...aaaaah...

i've just cleaned my thoroughly and its toking beautifully now...
...its a real pleasure to take a hit from it now. well it always was but now its just nicer than before!!

anyay merry, good joke, i liked it!
puff...puff...pass...
_________________
'Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there with open arms and open eyes. Whatever tomorrow brings I'll be there, I'll be there.' Incubus - Drive